Friday, October 14, 2005

3, 2, 1 ...

Why am I so similar to Victor Meldrew? For those of you who know Mr Meldrew, you don’t need an explanation. For those of you who do not, please conduct a search on your favourite search engine ...

In general, I am a happy soul but I have a pressure point, deep within my brain, that can cause me to switch into 'grumpy mode'. And why is that? Well, it's because the world we live in today is less tolerant of others and there are people out there who are simply 'ill-educated', especially when it comes to respect of the common man. Everyone gets p***ed-off by something and I do my utmost to enjoy life but ... there’s always some ‘crapaud’ out there, who is hell-bent on spoiling it.

Here’s my top ten of mood-changers;

1) Very loud music late at night from apartments frequented by BOBOs*
2) A neighbour who uses an electric power tool at 10pm on a Sunday evening
3) People who lean on their car horns simply because they’ve been stationary for more than 20 seconds
4) People who criticise, yet have no first-hand experience of what they are criticising
5) Tourists who yell and shout in the streets, thinking that the neighbourhood is some kind of cyber-world ‘reality’ game where no-one else exists
6) People on trains with the latest mobile telephones kitted out with the loudest ring-tones (apparently the ‘vibrate’ mode was an option)
7) People on trains who talk loudly on mobile phones (thinking that the train carriage is some kind of cyber-world ‘reality’ game where no-one else exists)
8) Men who barge through a door which was originally opened for a woman
9) Dog poo - everywhere
10) Cyclists who whistle by, missing you by millimetres while yelling all forms of abuse, as you calmly and carefully cross the road on a ‘green man’

I guess I am at a difficult age.

In fact, I don't think I've listed anything there that the average person wouldn't find particularly 'agreeable'.

Yes, things were different when we were younger. Manners were in common use and adhered to. People had respect for others. And the youth of today (standby; tirade warning), what are they putting in the water??? You can’t fail to miss large, bulging adolescents in ill-fitting clothing. Especially the female variety on a nice sunny day, with a large roll of German-style beer belly flopping over the top of their jeans. And the male population could do something to sharpen their appearance too; jeans hanging down to their knees, revealing the band of some designer underwear.

You call that style? I thought he’d just hauled himself out of a drain.

OK, I’ve spent enough weaponry on the above.

I expect my temperature to have subsided for my next posting. But, then again ...

But for now, for all those Victors out there, don't forget;

"All for one ... and each man for himself!"



* BOBO = Bourgeois Bohemians; rich kids who live off their even richer parents (who bought the apartment in the first place). They sleep until after lunch, do sod all the rest of the time and believe that life owes them a living by keeping everyone awake until 3 in the morning with loud 'jungle' music. I hate them (and their squealy girlfriends) with a passion. They are only slightly ahead of those cosseted French public sector workers who go on strike at the drop of a hat ‘to get their point across’. Yeah, right.)


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