Friday, October 21, 2005

Getting Into A Flap …

To anyone with the slightest grip on reality, you can’t help but notice that the world’s ‘meed-ja’ are currently in a flat spin over bird flu, yet they will never admit that it’s been blown out of proportion. Tut tut, oh dear, no … very bad for business.

This is just what the doctor ordered.

Each day, newspapers roll off the presses, full of ‘all you need to know’ facts on the disease and promoting the latest government spin on the (I love this word) ‘pandemic’. The same information is urgently regurgitated by news presenters who, in turn, invite an expert scare-monger-of-the-day to help spread the word according to Roche, makers of the vaccine. “Beware! Get yourself inoculated! You’ll all be sprouting feathers if you don’t!” All this is beautifully gift-wrapped with accompanying images of eastern gentlemen, dressed as surgeons, loading dead birds into incinerators.

Nice. See what I mean? Please enjoy your breakfast.

While we’re on the subject of crispy duck, have you noticed that whenever the ‘meed-ja’ illustrate the (here we go again) ‘pandemic’, they invariably use an agency picture of someone Asian surrounded by birds? Do alarm bells sound in your head? Don’t you think that those who have been infected actually work in close proximity to birds? Chicken farmers for example? After all, the longer you spend in your average hospital, the more chance you have of picking something up, unconnected to your original complaint.

However, the government of the day needs to be seen to be doing something. They can’t sit around apportioning blame left, right and centre but if H5N1 does decide to spread westwards and infest our feathered friends, then at least government ministers can sleep easier at night. So, let’s look at a few facts that are readily and freely available to anyone who can be bothered to dig them up;

According to the World Fact File, there are currently
6,446,131,400 living, breathing people on this planet, right now.
30,000 people are killed each year by someone waving a handgun in the US,
219 people are killed each year by horses (evil creatures),
6,000 people die in Europe from ‘normal’ flu each year,
… and human deaths to date caused by bird flu; 60+

Now, read them again.

Influenza manages to polish off those poor souls who are vunerable; the very weak and the infirm. So, if you are aged 65+ or have a lung, heart or kidney disease, suffer from diabetes, have a low immunity or live in a residential or nursing home, then please go ahead and get yourself inoculated against influenza.

If you want to avoid bird flu, then ignore the constant drivel spouted by your favourite tabloid … trot down to your local health centre or doctors surgery and pick up a free ‘Government Issued’ leaflet … it’ll be just the shot in the arm you are looking for.




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