Friday, January 26, 2007

Cooking Lessons ...

Raytheon have just announced the arrival of a breed of rioter repellant - both singular and plural.

"The Silent Guardian is", say the manufacturer, "revolutionary less-than-lethal directed energy application that employs millimeter wave technology to repel individuals or crowds without causing injury." They carry on with some superb 'wordsmithery', explaining their new weapon (sorry - deterrent): "Silent Guardian produces precise effects at longer ranges than current less-than-lethal systems and provides real-time ability to establish intent and de-escalate aggression."

The idea is that this truck-mounted piece of trickery sends out a 360-degree mini-microwave signal that heats the skin of an individual up to 54C (130F) which penetrates less than 0.5mm of skin. They claim that it avoids injury, although long-term effects are not known. Goodie. Makes me feel SO much better as the French will probably give their police force take-home versions.

So, anyone going to an anti-G8 or WTO rally in the future, here's today's top tip: while shouting your hate-ridden slogans at the intended government minister/CEO or billionaire, keep some microwave food in your inside pocket ... let it cook while YOU do!

Stu

3 Comments:

Blogger Joker said...

So instead of being locked up, you'll just be subject to home bound testing of new equipment?

Saturday, January 27, 2007 12:04:00 am  
Blogger Stu said...

It just the idea of "long-term effects are not known" that worries me. Suppose you're too young to remember the 'Ready Brek' tv commercials ...?

Saturday, January 27, 2007 6:47:00 am  
Blogger Joker said...

Maybe...Just because I'm young doesn't mean you can be ageist (sp?)...*cough*

Sunday, January 28, 2007 1:47:00 am  

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