Vee Haf Vays ...

A primary school in Wales* has recently banned it's pupils from making Mother’s Day cards. Why would they do this to the little 'uns? Well, it's in case they upset their fellow classmates without a mum.

School Head, 'Oberstabsfeldwebel' Helen Starkey ended the tradition because a minority of children have either been bereaved or separated from their mothers. All 357 pupils at the school were lined up and told "You vill not be making karts fur yer mutters zis year!". The day, which falls on March 18, has now been cancelled for the little tykes. 46-yr old 'Oberstabsfeldwebel' Starkey said: “I have taken zis dezision because it iz inzensitive to pupils zeparated from zer mutters. More dan fife perzent of children here are."

However, one mutter said: “Nobody wants to be hard-hearted to kids without a mum but it means that 95 per cent of pupils are deprived of a traditional activity.”

We're all getting far too sensitive. It's going the same way as Christmas decorations, innit?

Stu

* a small backward enclave in the British Isles, renowned for anti-social behaviour with farm creatures.